Mom used to send me money to go buy clothes, and it took me years (and a full closet of stuff I never wear) to tell her that I simply don’t have the same clothing thing she does. It took awhile but she came to understand that while I have stuff she doesn’t value, it’s valuable to me. So now when she sends money, she knows I’ll definitely do something with it that’s important to me, but not necessarily what she’d do for herself.
If a huge deal is going to be made out of this, I’d fall back on Keisha’s plan B, to do a little nice something for herself but send the bulk of it to the EF.